White Horse Temple (白馬寺) – William J. Long (龍偉安)

William J. Long (龍偉安)

As I traveled across China during the summer of 1985, I tried to visit many of the places my students had recommended. For many Chinese, temples are an important place to visit because of their social or historical importance. I didn’t have a particular interest in Chinese temples, but in the spirit of “while in Rome, do as the Romans,” as I traveled – from Harbin in the north, near the Russian border, to Canton in the south, and from Shanghai in the east to as far west as Xian – I made a point of seeing some of the temples my students had recommended. I knew when I returned to Da Gong¹ for the fall semester, I would be quizzed about my summer vacation.

I went to Qufu, the temple where Confucius lived, taught and is now buried. I went to Shaolin Temple – the Buddhist temple known as the origin of a popular form of martial arts. I also went to Penglai Ge, the 1000-year-old Taoist Temple which overlooks the ocean, and from which, reportedly, at certain times of the year, one can look out across the ocean and see a mirage of a distant city. And I went to Baima Si in Henan Province, near the city of Luoyang. As was the case with many of the places my students recommended, I hadn’t heard of Baima Si² (白馬寺) – literally “White Horse Temple” – and probably would not have gone out of my way to visit it. However, my journey that summer took me to the home of one of my students who lived near White Horse Temple. So, a visit to my student meant a trip to White Horse Temple.

As I entered the grounds of White Horse Temple, my first impression was that it was small compared to other temples I had seen. My second impression was that if you’ve seen one Chinese temple, you’ve seen them all. However, at this point I did not know what type of temple it was – Buddhist, Taoist or Confucian. In any case, I wasn’t particularly interested in or fascinated by anything I saw, and thus didn’t spend much time in the first temple building. However, that changed when I entered another building on the temple grounds.

The building consisted of a long, but somewhat narrow, room. There were a series of statues that lined the walls on opposite sides of the length of the room. These figures were different from statues I had seen in other temples. Often the human figures are larger than life. And, often, the faces on the statues and figures were not human, but depicted gods or demons from their mythology. At White Horse Temple, the figures were approximately life-sized and depicted very human looking individuals. There were about half a dozen or so on one side of the room and an equal number on the opposite side.

After entering the room, I started walking down one side of the room. At this point, I had no idea who or what these figures represented. Perhaps they were former abbots of the temple? Or perhaps they were figures from that given religion’s history or mythology? I probably spent five to ten seconds in front of the first figure before proceeding to the next one. I don’t think I actually stopped at the next few figures, but just looked at them as I slowly walked down that side of the room – much as one would walk along a wall of paintings in a museum, just glancing at them when none particularly caught one’s eye.

When I got to the fifth or sixth figure, at some point I “woke up,” as if from a daydream, and found myself standing in front of the figure. I had no idea exactly how long I had been standing there, but probably not more than a minute. I then stood there for another five or six seconds before I realized that I had stopped walking. But not only that, as I stood there, I felt an incredible sense of serenity. The feeling was more than just a sense of serenity or tranquility. I felt a sense of “detachment” from everything, as if I didn’t have a care in the world. Upon realizing that this change had come over me, and that I had stopped walking, I proceed to the next figure. As I did, that feeling of serenity left me. Moving from one figure to the next was like turning a light switch off – one moment the feeling was there, and the next moment it was gone.

I stood there for a moment, baffled that I would have such a reaction and that it would disappear as quickly as it came. I walked back to the figure, and as soon as I stood before it that sense of serenity enveloped me again. I was even more baffled. I felt so serene as I stood there. I didn’t want to move, yet I was curious about what was happening to me. Finally, I moved to the figure prior to that one, and as I did, again, that feeling left me.

What was going on? I wondered if I was reacting to that particular statue because I had looked at it more carefully than the others. If I actually looked closely at the other figures, would I have a similar reaction? I walked very slowly back to the beginning of the row of figures, looking carefully at each one. I had no particular reaction to any of them. I then proceeded back up the row of figures, towards the one in question. Again, I had no reaction to any of them until I came to the one in question. Although I had intended to walk by it slowly, and proceed to the end of the row of figures, once again I was stopped in my tracks. I was overcome by an incredible sense of tranquility.

This feeling, whatever its cause, seemed to be related to that particular figure. I stood there again with a sense of serenity and detachment. I could have stayed there forever were it not for my curiosity about the experience itself. Once again I moved to the next figure in the row. Once again the feeling left me as quickly as it came. And when I returned to the figure, the feeling returned.

I decided to walk across the room to the other side of the hall to see if any of the figures on that side of the room would cause a similar reaction. As I walked down the row of figures on the opposite wall, standing before each one for a few seconds, I had no particular reaction to any of them. Finally, I returned to the figure in question. As soon as I did, the sense of tranquility returned.

The response – whatever it was and whatever its cause – was repeatable and it was definitely related to that particular statue. I stared at the figure trying to determine if it somehow reminded me of something or someone; it didn’t. The figure itself was not all that different from all the other figures in the hall. Yes, the face was different. The hand gestures were different. But it was still just a figure, like all the others. There was nothing that really stood out about this one, or any of them for that matter. So why did it invoke that feeling of serenity when the others didn’t?

I decided that my reaction to the statue was one mystery I wouldn’t be able to solve, at least not then and there; nor would I be able to stand there forever, so, reluctantly, I continued on to the next building on the temple grounds. The remainder of the visit to White Horse Temple was uneventful.

Before I left the temple, I bought some postcards and a booklet describing the temple. That’s when I learned that White Horse Temple was the first Buddhist temple in China. It was founded in 68 A.D. by Chinese and Indian monks returning from India where they had studied Buddhism. These monks were the first to bring Buddhism to China. The figures that lined the walls depict arhats, or “Buddhas.” They represented actual people who were companions of the original Buddha. According to the Buddhist beliefs, these particular individuals had achieved enlightenment or “nirvana” and were now freed from the cycle of rebirth.

One set of postcards I bought contains photographs of each of the arhats. While still in China, I made a notation on the back of the postcard of the arhat in question. Since returning to the States, I’ve conducted an experiment several times over the years. I was curious to see what reaction, if any, I would have to the photographs of the figures of the arhats. Enough time elapsed between experiments – usually three or four years – that I’d forget exactly what this particular arhat looked like. And again, there is nothing about it that particularly distinguishes it from all the others.

In the experiments, I would take out the stack of postcards, shuffled it like a deck of cards, then flip through them. The figures were similar enough that the first few times I looked through the stack of postcards, I wasn’t sure which one it was. As I went through the pictures, one by one, I would wonder, “Is this the one?” But each and every time I came to one particular picture, I had a reaction similar to the reaction I had while standing in front of the figure of the arhat. The reaction was not nearly as intense. It was just a shadow of the actual experience. But it was undeniable. And when I turned over the postcard to see if the notation I made was on the back, indeed, it was. Over the years, the reaction to the photograph of that particular arhat becomes less and less. Also, even though I wait three or four years between experiments, I think I’ve started to memorize which postcard is of the arhat in question, so I now recognize it as soon as I see it.

I can think of no reason why I had that unexpected, yet consistent, reaction to the figure of that particular arhat. This experience was, and still is, a mystery to me. However, just because I cannot explain it does not mean that it is inexplicable. Thus I share this story with the hope that someone, perhaps someone with a Buddhist background, or someone with a background in neurology, or even psychology, might be able to offer some insight into what I experienced.

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Although originally written in 2009 for a creative writing class at Laney College in Oakland, California, in August of 2026, I decided to share this story with others who might be able to offer some insights into this experience. I can be reached through the contact page on my website. When responding, please include “White Horse Temple” in the subject line. My sincere thanks to all who do take the time to read this and give me their considered feedback.

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1 Actually 大連工學院 (Dalian Gong Xue Yuan – Dalian Institute of Technology), but it gets abbreviated to “大工” (Da Gong).

2 “Bai” sounds like “Bye.” “Ma” rhymes with “Baa” as in Baa, baa black sheep. “Si” sounds like the “si” in “sister”